Jokes, any will do

C

Chump1

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Woman turns to her hiking partner ashen faced. What’s wrong she enquires?
I’ve just opened my haversack and it’s got a parachute in it.
And my husband has just jumped from a plane with my haversack and packed lunch
 
MrTickle711

MrTickle711

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"Give it to me! Give it to me!" she yelled. "I'm so wet, give it to me now!" She could scream all she wanted, but I was keeping the umbrella.
 
LittleDarcy

LittleDarcy

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A mother asked her daughter "Darling what is your christmas wish this year?"

The daughter replied "I would like to help people in need! I wish that father christmas would send some clothes to all the naked girls in dad's computer"
 
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