Jokes, any will do

[Hot4u]

 

[Hot4u]

 

[Hot4u]

 

[Flexi12]

A family's driving behind a dustbin lorry when a dildo flies out and thumps against the windshield. Embarrassed, and trying to spare her young son's innocence, the mother turns around and says, "Don't worry, dear. That was just an insect." "Wow," the boy replies. "I'm surprised it could get off the ground with a cock like that!"

 

[Flexi12]

A husband tells his wife, “I bet you can’t say something that’ll make me happy and sad at the same time”. She thinks for a bit and says “your penis is bigger than your brother’s”.

 

[Flexi12]

When 3 people have sex is called a threesome. When it’s just 2, it’s a twosome. I guess that’s why they call me handsome.

 

[Flexi12]

The nurse at the sperm bank asked me if I’d like to masturbate in the cup. I said, “Well, I’m pretty good, but I don’t think I’m ready to compete just yet.”

 

[Flexi12]

I went to the GP's this morning to get my test results. He said, "I'm afraid it isn't the news we were hoping for. Your illness is very serious indeed". I said, "Oh, I'm devastated, I can't believe it. I think I'd like a second opinion". The doctor replied, "Of course, you're fucking ugly, too".

 

[Cazz]

 

[Cazz]

 

[Cazz]

 

[singleMBucks]

 

[Flexi12]

View attachment 94389

Ha ha ha, brilliant. The funniest thing is that it IS absolutely true. Should be called, 'Harry Potter and the Cut and Paste Saga'. Sorry, HP fans. I must confess I did enjoy reading these books to my kids. All good fun.

 

[Cazz]

 

[Cazz]

 

[Flexi12]

I took out one of those payday loans to pay for an exorcism. If I don't keep up with the payments, I'll be reposessed.

 

[Flexi12]

Did you hear about that choirboy who tied a bell to his dick? The priest tolled him off.

 

[Adie]

 

[Cazz]

 

[Cazz]