Jokes, any will do

Kris1973

Kris1973

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Everyday I wake up and announce loudly to my family that I am going jogging. Then I don't go... It's a running joke!


The Omicron variant is like a Katy Perry song...mild but pretty catchy!
 
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shinymacman

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Two dogs waiting to see the vet. One is an Alsatian, the other a poodle and they start having a chat. The Alsatian asks 'What are you here for mate?' The poodle answers 'I've been a naughty boy..It all started when some new people moved in next door. They have got this gorgeous poodle bitch and it was love at first sight. A week or so ago she was in the garden sunbathing and I couldn't resist her any more so I took a running jump over the garden fence and jumped upon her - well now she's pregnant so my master has bought me here for the big snip'

The Alsatian said 'I've been a naughty boy as well. My masters gorgeous girlfriend came to stay for the weekend. She cooked Sunday lunch and gave me some it was delicious. After lunch I was having a nap on the landing upstairs and was woken up by the sound of running water. I looked up and saw my masters girlfriend bent over the bath stark naked and I couldn't resist her. I went up behind her and completely ravaged her from behind. 'So are you here to have the big snip as well?' the poodle asks. 'No' the Alsatian replies 'I've come to have my claws clipped'.
 
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Brettsexmeet

Guest
Little Tommy and his mate walked past window and see naked lady in window fanny out and tits tommy runs off his m8 watches till lady closes curtains tommy m8 runs to find tommy after and says m8 she was hot why did you run tommy......... and tommy reply my mum said if I see a naked lady befor I'm 16 ill turn to stone then tommy say and I felt somthing getting hard
 
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