How To Dress Sexy as A Milf with Daughters

[ValerieC]

This is partly inspired by an Auntie Jane Post, but I've started to wonder if I am having an adverse affect on my daughters confidence, or at least mindset, by how I look, and I have no one else to ask so thought this might be a good place to get some thoughts.

I don't dress especially 'sexy' or revealing in life, pretty normally to be honest, but I do like very tight jeans and tight tops. Not overtly sexual, but I guess you could say due to my small frame and slightly larger than average assets they are emphasised in how I dress.

This makes me feel good, as is obvious, but now my girls are getting older as teenagers they too have started to worry more about what they're wearing and their dress sense has changed over last few months.

I don't know if I'm just being paranoid and feeling like I have more influence than I do, lol, and they're just doing what's normal, and there's more influencial things out there than their mum. I just don't want to be adding to any social pressure by having some big boobs and a tight top lol, because I'll change it up if so.

Any thoughts, please. Thank you.

 

[AuntyJayne]

I hope that my dress sense is a positive influence upon my daughter. My everyday wear is usually vest tops and jeggings. I do wear dresses from time to time and I do enjoy getting dressed up for a meal or a night out.
My daughter has her own individual style as do most sixteen going on 17 yr olds. I don't believe my dress sense has any detrimental effect on her but if ever I thought it was I would certainly look to change my look.

 

[ValerieC]

Based on what I've said, would you say it's likely my influence that's making them more aware of how they're dressing or just age.

 

[paul50]

Hi there I’m no expert and probably talking crap lol, but I don’t think you should change anything.
To me it’s not just about looks it’s a confidence thing as well, if you look in the mirror and you think I look good then surely that’s ok. Being happy with the way you are can only rub off in a good way to your family and daughters will only find there own style eventually anyway.
So I say don’t worry. Paul x

 

[ValerieC]

Hi there I’m no expert and probably talking crap lol, but I don’t think you should change anything.
To me it’s not just about looks it’s a confidence thing as well, if you look in the mirror and you think I look good then surely that’s ok. Being happy with the way you are can only rub off in a good way to your family and daughters will only find there own style eventually anyway.
So I say don’t worry. Paul x

Yeah I do hope this is right. They're not acting negatively or anything, I've just noticed more effort and thought about what they're wearing and as I like to wear certain things, i just want to be making them think, oh mum dresses nice, we have to think about it too.

I'm sure their friends are the same and I'm just being silly.

 

[bridget]

As a mum to two grown up daughters, don’t worry, believe me if they disapprove of how you look they will tell you,
As a mum to your daughters only you can decide what influence you want to have on them and it’s no ones place you judge you for that.
Keep them safe, let them make mistakes and be there for them. You’re doing a great job like all mums out there x

 

[Carlocs]

Everyone should be themselves . Obv i guess kids will look up to their parents but as we did , they will have their own fashion n trends n still think oldies can be embarrassing lol .

 

[AuntyJayne]

with apologies for posting a pic of my daughter and myself in typical garb, I don't think there's anything overtly sexual in either typical outfit, ( excepting the heavy handed make-up that every teen seems to 'experiment' with).

 

[paul50]

Hi say just let them be themselves and they will learn and do there own thing. And you shouldn’t change either because that could put concerns in there head. Kids today are more grown up than ever so don’t worry. Paul x

 

[paul50]

Hi your daughter looks amazing sexy but not over the top. Her own comfortable style. X

 

[Bigjugs]

My daughter is a pure tomboy like I was as a teenager .... I have bought her nice jeans etc but the sport gear and trainers always win ... mind u she is only 14 but these days girls her age cake their face in make up and wear practically nothing at parties and look about 22 years old .. which , In a way im glad she isnt the "typical 2020 teen"

 

[Sam62]

This is partly inspired by an Auntie Jane Post, but I've started to wonder if I am having an adverse affect on my daughters confidence, or at least mindset, by how I look, and I have no one else to ask so thought this might be a good place to get some thoughts.

I don't dress especially 'sexy' or revealing in life, pretty normally to be honest, but I do like very tight jeans and tight tops. Not overtly sexual, but I guess you could say due to my small frame and slightly larger than average assets they are emphasised in how I dress.

This makes me feel good, as is obvious, but now my girls are getting older as teenagers they too have started to worry more about what they're wearing and their dress sense has changed over last few months.

I don't know if I'm just being paranoid and feeling like I have more influence than I do, lol, and they're just doing what's normal, and there's more influencial things out there than their mum. I just don't want to be adding to any social pressure by having some big boobs and a tight top lol, because I'll change it up if so.

Any thoughts, please. Thank you.

For what my thoughts are worth as a single dad as I raised my daughtem who I guess I did not influence with my jeans etc. I always thought my daughter's closes were not appropriate etc. But then I looked around and saw so many other kids same age similar clothes hair styles etc. So my advice, stop and look at other kids same she's as yours, not their friends but in general, if see they dress similar then you will know it not your influence but just the trend.
If they do take some influence from mum, is that bad thing, if you happy with self then why should they not be

 

[shambles925]

As a father of two daughters I can say they’ll always have their own minds. They will be influenced by others including yourself but the final decision will be theirs. They will make mistakes because they are human and because they are no different from any of the rest of us in that respect. It’s very obvious from your post that you’re a very proud mum and rightly so, and I’m sure your daughters are every bit as proud of you as you are of them. Your daughters may occasionally wear something you don’t like but I’m sure you wore something as a teenager that your mum didn’t like. All I’d say is keep being yourself and they will do the same x

 

[shambles925]

View attachment 29689 with apologies for posting a pic of my daughter and myself in typical garb, I don't think there's anything overtly sexual in either typical outfit, ( excepting the heavy handed make-up that every teen seems to 'experiment' with).View attachment 29690

Another mum who should be very proud, just like all the other mums on here

 

[ValerieC]

Thanks for all your replies. It's not so much what they wear, or worrying about how they dress as I'm fine with them doing what they want, unless of course something changes and they decide its a good idea to have their ass out of a skirt or something ridiculous like that, it's more a worry that by paying attention to what I'm wearing, or how my make up is, I'm giving them the signal that it's something to worry about.

I dont worry I just like to look and feel a certain way, but I don't want the message to be, worry.

If that makes sense.

 

[Sam62]

Th

Thanks for all your replies. It's not so much what they wear, or worrying about how they dress as I'm fine with them doing what they want, unless of course something changes and they decide its a good idea to have their ass out of a skirt or something ridiculous like that, it's more a worry that by paying attention to what I'm wearing, or how my make up is, I'm giving them the signal that it's something to worry about.

I dont worry I just like to look and feel a certain way, but I don't want the message to be, worry.

If that makes sense.

If it is that big a concern, just talk to them about it and explain, that you put makeup on and dress way you do because it pleases you and not because worried about appearance, just that it is what you like. There is always a message for kids and by talking to them, the message is not confused. Maybe? If that make sense

 

[ValerieC]

So many of the responses focus on what they may be wearing, which really isn't my concern it's the psychological. I think I may just be worrying needlessly, though.

 

[Secretliaisons1969]

So many of the responses focus on what they may be wearing, which really isn't my concern it's the psychological. I think I may just be worrying needlessly, though.

There are far more important things to be concerned or worry about as regards your family. Your daughters will always want you to be yourself & dress exactly how you wish & like to dress. As they will themselves depending upon their personalities. Fashion is an individual choice. There are times that plunging necklines & short skirts etc are not appropriate. You will decide that.

 

[Carlocs]

So many of the responses focus on what they may be wearing, which really isn't my concern it's the psychological. I think I may just be worrying needlessly, though.

I would say if they had concerns over what u wore im sure they would tell u . Or u could ask them what they thought n approach it in a fun fashion kinda way / query n see what they say

 

[ValerieC]

Turns out that they are focused on Instagram and their girl friends, and looking sexy, seems their old mum plays little part lol

They were almost incredulous lol a relief, although slightly, slightly disheartening.