joke

BDSM: through lego... Masochist: treads on piece of lego then again and again and again Sadist: places the lego and watches the person tread on it Brat: skips past first piece with tongue out and steps on the two pieces setup just for this Sub: asks for permission to step on lego Sir...

* appears I need to post something new to appease regular viewers of my content. * in the kitchen preparing dinner. Me: Alexa set timer for 15mins. Alexa: I think that's too long. Me: WTF you on about now? Alexa: I think you're kidding yourself you'll last that long. Me: I'm trying to...

at 6 the alarm goes off Me: Alexa alarm off alarm continues Me: Alexa alarm stop alarm continues Me: ALEXA STOP! Alexa: would you like to set your safe word? Me: safe word? Fuck off Alexa: sorry that's 2 words Me: shit Alexa: sorry that doesn't meet the minimum character length Me...

My troubles with my smart home have escalated... Yellow light flashing. Me: Alexa notifications Alexa: your order including Alexa owner manual, 101 Alexa commands, hands on Alexa training will be delivered today. Me: but I didn't order anything Silence Me: Alexa what do you know about...

My teething problems with my smart home continues... * Yellow light flashing Me: Alexa notifications Alexa: you recently purchased an Alexa would you like to rate it out of 5 stars Me: sure I'll give it 1. Alexa: would you like to give a reason for this? Me: she doesn't listen, doesn't do...

It says to introduce and I do enjoy a joke. Here is some sample interactions with my smart device and you decide?... Is my smart home a secret brat??? Me this morning 6am... Me: Alexa bathroom light on. Alexa: nothing Me: * stubs toe. Muffled bastard under my breath. Alexa: sorry I don't...

MAN RULES AT LAST A GUY HAS TAKEN THE TIME TO WRITE THIS ALL DOWN FINALLY, the guys' side of the story. ( I MUST ADMIT, IT'S PRETTY GOOD.) WE ALWAYS HEAR 'THE RULES' FROM THE FEMALE SIDE NOW HERE ARE THE RULES FROM THE MALE SIDE THESE ARE OUR RULES! PLEASE NOTE. THESE ARE ALL NUMBERED #1...

I recently bought a blow-up sex doll. I took it back to the shop yesterday. I said to the guy, "I blew it up and it went down on me." The guy said, "If I'd known it did that, I'd have charged you more for it." As you might have guessed by now, I enjoy a good laugh. Anybody else out there...