Personally I'm the same as you . I joined grinder app and I've met a lot of nice guys that like too chat at 1st and respect my discretion and keep me safe . I've only chatted with them at the mo but they are making me want too take that big step a little more . Find someone that's in the same...
Like myslef you prob find the thought and idea erotic and horny but you don't have power to go through with it . My problem is after the deed I wouldn't be able too handle the guilt! . So I leave it as a fantasy and watch cheating or affair videos its fulfills that urge .