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Realtor

Dogs have masters cats have staff.

Teat

Crabs

Bah humbug until Christmas week then deck the halls. Too busy trying to clear the desk to get away before then. Black Friday deals or put it in an escrow account for a wintry day.

Humour me

False if you mean in public with a loved one great TNP has got their bits sunburnt when naked

May be interesting you can judge As a young officer cadet at Sandhurst we were positioned on top of a hill surrounded by Gurkhas playing the red team and attacking us. The training instructor picked me out and barked “what would you do now?” I took out my packet of benson and hedges flipped the...

I watched in 1977 the local chippy man in Stamford win the pickled egg eating record shortly after he puked so did I one pickled egg is enough to make you gag @Firefly is this the same aphrodisiac effect as oysters. Fancy a catch up

Preferred sticky little fingers myself The next person has got a fucking clue about what we’re talking about

Oral me

Why is it that when going out for a pleasant pub dinner women always seem to say I can’t have chips the proceed to eat most of yours Then couldn’t possibly eat a pudding on their own so winsome say shall we share one? Well predict what happens next Venus is stuffed to the gunnels and Mars is still

I picked up a hitchhiker on Halloween. Making small talk I suavely said “and what do you do” She said “I’m a witch” so I said “prove it” So she put her hand on my thigh And I turned into a lay-by.

Rules matron double jeez

False or is it a euphemism for up the duff in which case yes TNP thinks Viv can plough his own furrow (again not a euphemism j

False unfortunatel rarely have time now but would like to. Have done so with BBC Dickens costume dramas TNP Bleak House 2005 with Gillian Anderson deserved binging on

Hope the gate keeper of the rules hasn’t crossed the line. Had to do the Fandance as part of selection so these days like walking in the fens. Snuggles in bed or up like the lark @DoubleJeez

Black Friday deals

Depends on how day has gone and if brain still whirring. Play mindfulness music or read a book to nod off